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VTMAS 81: I'm Disappointed

Living with someone "on the spectrum" or who's autistic comes with unforeseen interactions that leave you questioning yourself at times. I've been fortunate that my little one, who is growing up fast these days, is verbal and considered fully functional. That doesn't mean he'll ever be able to leave the nest, but until we cross that bridge, I am bestowed some of the most peculiar interactions and conversations.


On this particular morning, my husband who has been seeing him off, was feeling ill and so I picked up the mantle to wake Link up and get him to the bus stop. Much to my surprise he was already dressed and ready and off we went. It was a rainy day, so we sat in the car when this conversation unfolded.


Link: Thanks mom. I'm proud of you.


Me: For what, baby?


Link: Um, you know, brining me to the bus stop.


Me: Well, dad wasn't feeling well, so it was my turn.


Link: I mean, you know, you never bring me to the bus stop.


Me: Well I work late and sleep in. I'm sorry, buddy. I didn't know it meant that much to you.


Link: You never pick me up from the bus stop.


Me (feeling judged): Um, do you want me to?


Link: I'm disappointed in you, Mom.


Me (baffled and hurt): Do you want me to pick you up from the bus stop today?


Link (in a disgusted tone and expression): Um, no. Don't do that. Ever.


Me (confused): Then why are you disappointed in me if you don't want me to pick you up or drop you off, why tell me your disappointed in me? That's hurtful.


Link (deadpan and monotone as he does often): I just needed you to know you disappoint me. [Bus arrives] Bye. Oh, and don't be here when I get back.


I sat there not sure if I should laugh or cry over it. Hands in the air, confused and baffled on what just transpired. Exactly how does someone disappoint someone about not doing the thing they didn't want you to do in the first place????

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